"I want someone to break your heart, but I hope someone else fixes it."

I have papers scattered around my room and inside my head. They're things that actually mean something. Like that one song I listened to while falling in love with you. The two lines that someone would call pointless but others would call poetry. 

I don't know how to write anymore. I don't know how to live or how to love. Do we always have to go through the heartbreak. I never remember wanting this. I never wanted to fall in love with you but you are the one who pushed it, the one who said "I love you" first.

I kissed you first,

        but you kissed me back. 

I think you gave the first hug. 

You initiated the first conversation. 

You made me fall in love when I didn't want to.